I heard a few days ago that my application to present a paper on my work, with a focus on women and animals, has been unanimously approved. It will be held at the Jawaharlal Nehru University, New Delhi – India.

I now have to work hard to see if can raise the funds to go… but it feels great that all the judges liked my proposal, anyway!

I’ve also heard that one of my works has been selected for the Discerning Eye show at The Mall Galleries in November… really pleased! And my new large watercolour painting on canvas, Woman of the Mountain with Spirit Deer, has come through the first round of judging at the RWA… really pleased! (Picture below)…

The first two days (you choose one!) will be on Monday 22nd, 11 – 3pm, and Tuesday 23rd September, 10 – 2pm.

As the Course develops we will be looking at a wide range of paths in to making work and responding to the above themes, including using Dream recall, responding with monotype and automatic drawing to Dream, the Animal within, working with the principal of generative absence, wilderness poetry, sacred music, looking at icons, religious imagery from a range of sources, shamanic walking…. and more…the first day will be an introduction, a beginning…

Call me on 07816 098807 for more details and to book a place.

I was thrilled to hear this morning that this painting, the Bird My Brother, has been selected for this show.

Here are some pictures from my talk at Arusha Gallery (Edinburgh) last Sunday:

I spoke about how I need to be awake and attentive in my working practice. How I need to pay attention to the surface I am working on, and be prepared to enter into a conversation, and to watch for tiny signs to help me, and listen attentively. I need to practice constancy. I spoke about my garden, how I grow plants from seed in the greenhouse. I spoke about the dark soil of the garden, and the dark soil of my pictures, from which I coax things to emerge, and nurture them into maturity and fruitfulness.

When in Edinburgh I found a book I’d been wanting to read, the Earthsea Trilogy by Ursula Le Guin. I like this passage very much:

“From that time forth he believed that the wise man is one who never sets himself apart from other living things, whether they have speech or not, and  in later years he strove long to learn what can be learned, in silence, from the eyes of animals, the flight of birds, the great slow gestures of trees.”

I had a very enthusiastic and generous group at Newlyn School of Art (run by Henry Garfit). I did a demonstration on making gesso and preparing paper and wood panels with it, then we did exercises using the breath and bodily impulses to generate images for development. We worked with subtle and faint traces of fragments of images which appeared.

So I am home to the brilliant light, the warm air, the soft water. Thinking about my talk on 24th august in Edinburgh, preparing myself, drawing out the threads which I will develop, and hoping for a receptive audience.

The sun is shining, the garden is still full, although here and there collapse is beginning, the drawing down to earth of the green curtain. The gladioli spikes are just coming into flower though, they will keep the autumn at bay; and the bulbs I will soon sow hold promises of spring.

This morning I went for a walk with Betsy and I gathered many blackberries. My fingertips became as horses lips, gently feeling their way around the soft fruit, and lifting them clear of their stems, and the nettles. Last night I had a dream of a man, who was letting me know that no embraces from him would be mine; I asked him therefore to withhold his gazes, for they had been as kisses,and I could not bear them.

Offering into my blazing gaze a trickle, a trace, a leaking from a containment. So I contain, I hold within all the forces which will not be soothed. No one comes to soothe. I am as a child again, there is no soothing, I do not learn to soothe myself. I turn to animals for their quiet gaze, and the sense of safety the garden offers, the trees with their enfolding branches, the stilled wings, the air made stiff but not stern, those branches which hold my gaze as I stare up at the sky, lying on the empty grass.

In my work there is the soothing between species, and I understand now that I look for it there: this soothing, this sense of safety, this loving tenderness I can receive from the horse, or the deer, or the dog, or the bird. There is also the physical contact, the warmth of skin on skin, stillness.

My blazing human gaze meets another human blazing gaze and my containment is breached. I leak, I want to pour; I am beside myself but no soothing comes. We do not speak. Or if we do I seem unable to hear you, I do not understand what you are trying to say.

A black and white nose slides along my thigh. Her warm breath and her doggy smell comfort me a little. She holds my gaze calmly, her eyes follow mine, stay with me.

I’ve never been to Edinburgh so I am very excited to see and explore. I’d like to see the Chinese cicadas as well as visiting the collections in the major spaces.

Here are some pictures of recent work which will be going to Edinburgh:

Really enjoying The Open by Agamben, thinking I must go to Milan to see the miniatures he describes. Wondering how is it that I make the work I do, knowing nothing about this writing, this thinking, and the two are so close in so many ways?

Then remembering my childhood and the animal world I would slip into to hide from the human one. How confusion and difficulty prompted this diving away then, but I was shown a path which helps me so much now.

Last night I had a dream about dreaming, and about how dreams can help us find the place to slip between worlds, which is where animals live, and is what I see in their eyes. They know their soul families, we look for ours.

The dream also contained a messenger (a shaman who taught me, who I used to work with) telling me about the drawings I can make for others, about their dreams, and how these can be healing for the recipients.

Here are the pictures which have been selected to travel to Colorado, to The Clara Hatton Gallery, in September…

   This work ‘Refined through Breath’ explores the refinement of vision which can occur through breath-sharing, breathing as a horse, re-entering the womb we share in order to gain clarity and a purity of vision

After a long hot coach journey to Victoria I stepped onto the pavement with my four bags and wondered how I was going to manage to reach Islington. I had my handbag, my rucksack (with clothes for the forecast storms), my portfolio with mounted unframed work and perspex for monotype-making, and my wheeled suitcase full of materials, banner, stall covering, cards and catalogues.( I had a dream last night that even my portfolio had wheel). It was very hot. so I walked a few steps, then stopped, then walked a few more. I was grateful I’d been going to the gym regularly to give me strong arms.

Two police officers helped me at Victoria British Rail but they stopped at the entrance to the tube, and the staf there told me they didn’t help with luggage, and there as no lift. Getting down the escalators wasn’t much fun. At Caledonian Road it as very hot and cabs were a rare species. I finally managed to wave one down and reached Hungerford Road with a very sweaty back.

A game of badminton in the garden oasis seemed a good idea so that was what we did, until dusk and the sky and my skin appeared yellow as the storm gathered above. Early the next morning the skies danced and sung, and awoke me early. I was on my way to Old Street tube, and then to putting up my stall, and the rain was holding off.

I strung Tibetan prayer flags behind me, and a  hoop I’d made of wood from a local Cornish wood, above me., as well as two little sculptures I’d made, to remind me of who I was… I also had works from dreams of mine, and examples of monotypes. I set about making anew work, from a dream of my parents who were strapped to oar blades, and I was trying to row, but the oar blades were sunk very deep into the water and it took a great effort from me to raise them to the surface, but I did manage to.

I made two dreams of visitors dreams, which was fewer than I thought I’d make, but they were two very fine dreams and I was pleased to be able to work with them, and I was pleased with the drawings I made, although in both cases I needed two attempts to get to the heart of the dream with the drawing.

The Fête itself was great – here are some photos…

Some friends came along which great, and students from long ago as well as from recent courses.

Now I’m home and preparing works to go to Edinburgh: measuring, titling, wrapping, framing, pricing… and finishing four pieces too, and trying to get in a quick swim each day the sun is shining…

and best morning joy is walking on the garden grass with bare feet, and eating my breakfast, communing with the plants which are all almost bursting with life….